Thema war es, einen Brief an jemanden zu schreiben, der versucht hat, Selbstmord zu begehen. Wie ich dabei auf MxM gekommen bin? Fragt mich was Leichteres. ;-) Matty und Mells sind halt doch immer in meinem Kopf.
Bevor jetzt einer von euch was sagt, der Text ist in jedemfall etwas AU, schon allein wegen der Eltern. Aber ich wusste in dem Moment nicht, wie ich es anders lösen sollte, ohne dass das Ganze total sinnlos auf jeden Verständigen wirkt (Roger? Near? ne, sicher nicht). Mello hört sich auch leicht OOC an, aber egal.
Ich bin in jedem Fall froh über meine 15 Punkte, die ich dafür bekommen hab und wünsche euch viel Spaß beim Lesen. Und denkt an die Kommi-Funktion des Blogs ;-)
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Dear Matt,
I got a call from your parents today. They were crying and said that you are in hospital. They said you tried to cut your wrists open and swallowed the pills in the medicine cabinet. I’m asking myself whether that is my fault? Did you do this because I left, because I didn’t say goodbye? You know I had to do so. It wasn’t my choice to make. If I could have done so, I would have taken you with me. I thought you knew that. As I write this I’m trying to decide, if I should come back. Would you even want me there? I always thought you were stronger than I am. You listened to my problems and rarely talked about yours. Should it have been the other way around? Should I have listened to you more? I know, I haven’t always done everything right, but … You know I always cared for you, right? The weeks I have been away from you were hard for me, too. I missed you. Of course I still do. I listened to your messages again and again. I wanted to call you, I really did, but I couldn’t. I wasn’t allowed to do so. That’s the reason why I am writing this letter instead of sitting in a plane to London.
When you get this letter and still want me around then please call me. I promise, I will be there as soon as possible.
There is something I want to tell you, Matt. I have wanted to tell you for some time, but I was always too afraid. This might not be the right time and maybe I should tell you in person – I promise, I will do so someday – but this is easier for me. What I wanted to tell you was that I love you. I really do. You always were the only person who cared enough to try and understand me. You can be really infuriating sometimes, but I couldn’t help but fall for you. And maybe, just maybe, you feel the same way. God, I think we’re strange, aren’t we? I started writing this because you tried to kill yourself and now I turned it into a letter about me and our relationship. I didn’t want to do so, I hope you know that. But anyway, I think you understand what I’m trying to say. I hope you’ll forgive me for what I have done to you and that you’ll call me. Please remember that I care about you and don’t do something stupid like that again, okay? I will buy a plane ticket now and come back. Please wait for me.
Love, Mello
1 Kommentar:
Das ist so süß und so traurieg und so... kann's nicht beschreiben <3
deine Punkte hast du dir echt verdient :>
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